They Tooks My SL Away!

SL residents/users/customers/addicts went apeshit crazy today as the guy on the corner of the internet, who sells the good stuff, was mysteriously absent for most of today.

Some dumbstruck, and in some cases just plain dumb, people hit the login screen to find their access denied because the whole of SL was down. Not just the grid, but the websites, the blogs and if rumour is to be believed, even Mark KingDonk's Thunking Machine, though further rumours persist that it is just a Hoover he turns on to make the residents' voices go away.

What people did for those nigh on nearly 12hrs is only now slowly becoming known. No doubt in several cases some were exposed to sunlight and were desperately reaching for a gamma slider. Others discovered hitherto unknown siblings, piles of mail, which forced them to remember their given name at birth and I daresay some even took the opportunity to change their underwear.

Relief wasn't too long in coming though as the Linden Overlords whipped the hamster wheels into action and lights started coming on across the grid, and going out in bedrooms and basements across the worlds. The SL Flogs, once up, were soon flooded by a previously unknown group called "The League of Idiots". I swear these people must have been sat in front of their monitors pressing refresh every 2 seconds till the site came up.

Once on to the blogs their first question was, "What's happening?", unaware of the fact that they were the only person around to answer it. Soon, the rest of league were turning up asking the same question over and over again. One suspects it was the tightness of their new underwear or the residual sun glare in their eyes that had caused them to not properly see the Grid Status update on their login screens.

Once the intial wave of idiots had self sedated and calmed down there appeared on the scene "The Regiment of The Righteously Outraged." These people had serious questions and wanted some serious answers. Nothing less than KingDonk himself being hauled into the court of public opinion and made to answer as to why SL was down while they slept in their beds was going to suffice for these people. Various numbers of the Regiment screamed that they needed to get inworld because they were concierge members and merchants and needed to be in their shops, oblivious of the fact that they wouldn't have any customers or visitors even if they could.

The grid did slowly though, after some stiff drinks and flattery, open her arms and embrace again her long lost lovers. Even this long withheld fix was not enough though to satiate the most ardent of the Green Ink Brigade. Back to various forums they came with some classic lines,

• "Something I took into my inventory 10 mins before shutdown is now rezzed on my land!!!",
  
• "I can't TP to my home, WHY!?!",
  
• "I can login, why can't my partner ffs LL!!!!",
  
• "I know it says there's inventory problems, but MY inventory isn't loading!"

To be serious for one moment. This prolonged outtage has been one of the most serious ones for LL and all of us for quite some time. What ever the cause is will no doubt be known or slowly revealed over time. It would be nice to know what is happening while we are all in limbo, but there are good commercial reasons why the likes of LL don't tell too much. Outtages such as this one are acceptable and reasonable if they are infrequent. Older SLers will remember times not so long ago when outtages were a weekly occurence and scheduled maintenance day meant 3 days of rolling restarts to fix what they broke when they were fixing something else.

We though, have to have some perspective, restraint and not go so apeshit; there is always First Life and it's not a bad place to login to every once in a while.

To finish, my award for the most hilarious and ironic post of the day goes to...